Wednesday, February 11, 2009

The IT Crowd

I have been adopted as our section's unofficial IT person. Yes, the Department has its own IT section full of staffless EOs (Jammy Bastards!) who have all the permissions to change settings, install software etc, but why drag them all the way down to us for piddling little operational matters, when there's a spare EO floating around the section just dying for something to help with (yeah, right).

I admit, I like technology and gadgets. I've ripped my own PC apart and rebuilt it with extra bits. And it didn't explode. Not even when I spilt coffee on it. I like messing with spreadsheets and formulae and macros and Photoshop and all kinds of boring stuff. So, when new to the job, I was eager to show off my prowess and lent a hand where I could. Assuming, of course, that all my colleagues knew the basic stuff.

Most of them did.

Others are complete luddites and have managed to work in an office for several years without learning anything beyond turning the thing on.

Yes, really!

Here are some of the IT emergencies I've helped with in the recent past.

CO: Govstooge! My monitor's switched itself off!
Govstooge: You've kicked the switch under your desk off. Try not to think about auditioning for Riverdance while you're working.

CO: My spreadsheet's disappeared!
Govstooge: No it hasn't. You minimised it.

CO: How do I attach a file to an email?
Govstooge: Get onto Supplies and ask them for a set of digital staples (Jeesus!).

CO: The printer's out of paper!
Govstooge: Here's a blank A4 sheet. Go to the photocopier and make some more.

CO: I was on the Internet looking up stuff and all of a sudden this 80s pop video came up on screen!
Govstooge: You've been Rickrolled. It happens to everyone sooner or later. You'll get over it.

Still, it's nice to know I'm needed. Bless 'em.

1 comment:

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