More Civil Service Olympics Events:
PMDS Form Relay - EO chases CO around the building with a PMDS form to be agreed and signed by the CO. Personnel section only join in the fun if the EO manages to catch the CO and get his signature so they can file it away. Forever.
Tea Break Sprint - EO has to get out of the office and into the canteen as quickly as possible before the HEO pounces with more work which just couldn't wait until midday.
Canteen Sprint - A test of agility and manual dexterity as employees try to get to the sausages before the person with the dirty fingernails who won't use the tongs provided gets at them.
Canteen Gymnastics - A beautiful display of synchronised movement as staff pivot and pirouette and limbo dance with trays and boiling hot coffee trying to keep out of each others' paths as they negotiate the circuitous route from coffee machine to spoons to sugar sachets to milk dispenser to biscuits and finally to the till.
Waste paper bin basketball - Letters from the public put to good use.
Long jump - CO has to jump over a line of managers from HEO to PO all of whom are bent over kissing the arse of the next most senior officer. Bonus points if the CO is fat and manages to squish the PO.
Insult-to-Paralympic event - Employees go the 500 metres to the nearest printer by wheeling themselves in their chairs because they're too fucking lazy to get up and walk to it.
Window Gymnastics - Fun for all as employees from CO to HEO in open-plan areas jump up and down and open and shut the windows as the weather dictates. Points lost if forms are blown to the floor. Points gained if most annoying employee is thrown out the window.
PMDS Form Relay - EO chases CO around the building with a PMDS form to be agreed and signed by the CO. Personnel section only join in the fun if the EO manages to catch the CO and get his signature so they can file it away. Forever.
Tea Break Sprint - EO has to get out of the office and into the canteen as quickly as possible before the HEO pounces with more work which just couldn't wait until midday.
Canteen Sprint - A test of agility and manual dexterity as employees try to get to the sausages before the person with the dirty fingernails who won't use the tongs provided gets at them.
Canteen Gymnastics - A beautiful display of synchronised movement as staff pivot and pirouette and limbo dance with trays and boiling hot coffee trying to keep out of each others' paths as they negotiate the circuitous route from coffee machine to spoons to sugar sachets to milk dispenser to biscuits and finally to the till.
Waste paper bin basketball - Letters from the public put to good use.
Long jump - CO has to jump over a line of managers from HEO to PO all of whom are bent over kissing the arse of the next most senior officer. Bonus points if the CO is fat and manages to squish the PO.
Insult-to-Paralympic event - Employees go the 500 metres to the nearest printer by wheeling themselves in their chairs because they're too fucking lazy to get up and walk to it.
Window Gymnastics - Fun for all as employees from CO to HEO in open-plan areas jump up and down and open and shut the windows as the weather dictates. Points lost if forms are blown to the floor. Points gained if most annoying employee is thrown out the window.
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