Thursday, February 14, 2008

Anti

So here it is, the anti-Valentine's day. This post is dedicated to HATE... and more specifically, the things I hate most. No particular order.

1. SUVs in the city. If you work in insurance and drive one of these, then you are a cunt. Since when do you need a vehicle with the words "land", "trail" or "pathfinder" in its name to get around the suburbs? Twats.
2. Those bloody vans and lorries with the yellow flashing lights on top. Who the hell do you think you are, some sort of alternative emergency vehicle? Fuck off and stop trying to make everyone unfortunate enough to be stuck behind you epileptic.
3. People who stand still on escalators, often two abreast, so no-one else can get past. Just because the stairs are moving doesn't mean you have to stand there with your mouths open staring ahead. No wonder your fucking arses are so fat. Go to the London Underground and try that at rush hour. You'll be lucky to get out alive.
4. Commercialism. I will not have marketing and advertising executives controlling what I do and when I do it. If I want to celebrate my alternative Easter in November by eating stones instead of overpriced crappy chocolate eggs, then that's what I'm doing.
5. City Planners. No explanation needed.
6. That fecking Jake guy on the telly. I would love to shove his fucking newspaper up his hole. Whistling bastard.

God, I must be going soft. I love a good rant.I can only come up with six for the moment. Maybe it's the day that's in it.

Friday tomorrow, though. Wooyay.

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