What the fuck is it with the weather these days? Sun beating down one minute, sub-Arctic conditions with a nice Polar wind thrown in for good measure the next. Some fucking August.
As a consequence, civil servants in the Department are getting loads of much-needed exercise jumping up and down to open and close the windows in their sections as the weather dictates. Recently the wind has been blowing relentlessly through the aisles upsetting the forms all over the floor and causing a lot of people to bend down more often than they are used to. There should be danger money for this additional strain on our flimsy functionary functions. And there is real danger of someone's fat arse emitting a loud fart as they crouch down to pick things up. It hasn't happened in my presence, but it's not a pleasant thought (My feelings in relation to bodily functions in the workplace here). It can set off a chain of events that can be damaging for people's careers.
Imagine, if you will, a mini tornado blowing around the section I work in, and a form has just fluttered to the floor.
Me: Oy, you, pick that up at once!
CO: Yes boss.
(CO bends over to pick up the form.)
CO's Arse: Brrrrrap!
CO: Oops!
Me: You dirty bastard. I'm writing you up for that.
And this problem isn't necessarily contained within a given section. Neighbouring sections, separated from ours only by thin partitions, who insist on flinging their windows open with wild abandon whatever the weather, could have a lot to answer for.
So think before you open a window in these unsettled times.
Think, god damn it!
As a consequence, civil servants in the Department are getting loads of much-needed exercise jumping up and down to open and close the windows in their sections as the weather dictates. Recently the wind has been blowing relentlessly through the aisles upsetting the forms all over the floor and causing a lot of people to bend down more often than they are used to. There should be danger money for this additional strain on our flimsy functionary functions. And there is real danger of someone's fat arse emitting a loud fart as they crouch down to pick things up. It hasn't happened in my presence, but it's not a pleasant thought (My feelings in relation to bodily functions in the workplace here). It can set off a chain of events that can be damaging for people's careers.
Imagine, if you will, a mini tornado blowing around the section I work in, and a form has just fluttered to the floor.
Me: Oy, you, pick that up at once!
CO: Yes boss.
(CO bends over to pick up the form.)
CO's Arse: Brrrrrap!
CO: Oops!
Me: You dirty bastard. I'm writing you up for that.
And this problem isn't necessarily contained within a given section. Neighbouring sections, separated from ours only by thin partitions, who insist on flinging their windows open with wild abandon whatever the weather, could have a lot to answer for.
So think before you open a window in these unsettled times.
Think, god damn it!
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